Becoming a mother might be the last thing on your mind right now. But you should set some goals about having (or not having) children — especially if you are sexually active. This is called a reproductive life plan, and it also involves knowing what actions you will take to support your goals. Your personal values and beliefs will help you make your plan. See some examples below.

Before you get pregnant

A healthy pregnancy begins before you become pregnant. It actually begins long before you even think about motherhood. Take a moment to learn what you can do now to make sure any future pregnancies are planned and healthy. All women can benefit from some basic pre-pregnancy planning.

If you are sexually active

Becoming a mother might be the last thing on your mind right now. But you should set some goals about having (or not having) children — especially if you are sexually active. This is called a reproductive life plan, and it also involves knowing what actions you will take to support your goals. Your personal values and beliefs will help you make your plan. See some examples below.

Picture of a woman smiling"I'm not ready to have children now. I will make sure I don't get pregnant by not having sex or using birth control correctly every time I have sex."

Picture of a woman smiling"I will wait to start having sex until after I'm married. I won't get pregnant until that time. Once I'm married, my husband and I will decide together when it's the right time for us to start a family."

Picture of a woman smiling"I would like to have two children, at least two years apart in age. I also have diabetes. I will meet with my doctor now to discuss my preconception health. I will start trying to get pregnant as soon as I'm healthy. I will use birth control after my first baby to make sure I don't get pregnant again before I am ready."

Picture of a woman "I want to finish school and be financially secure before starting a family. My husband and I will use an effective birth control all the time until we have met our goals and are ready to start a family."

Picture of a woman smiling"I will let pregnancy happen whenever it happens. Because I don't know when that time will be, I'll make sure that my body is healthy and ready for pregnancy at all times

 

 

Preconception health

Preconception health is a woman's health before she becomes pregnant. It means knowing how health conditions and risk factors could affect a woman or her unborn baby if she becomes pregnant. For example, some foods, habits, and medicines can harm your baby — even before he or she is conceived. Some health problems, such as diabetes, also can affect pregnancy.

Why preconception health matters

Every woman should be thinking about her health whether or not she is planning pregnancy. One reason is that about half of all pregnancies are not planned. Unplanned pregnancies are at greater risk of preterm birth and low birth weight babies. Another reason is that, despite important advances in medicine and prenatal care, about 1 in 8 babies is born too early. Researchers are trying to find out why and how to prevent preterm birth. But experts agree that women need to be healthier before becoming pregnant. By taking action on health issues and risks before pregnancy, you can prevent problems that might affect you or your baby later.

Five most important things to boost your preconception health

Women and men should prepare for pregnancy before becoming sexually active — or at least three months before getting pregnant. Some actions, such as quitting smoking, reaching a healthy weight, or adjusting medicines you are using, should start even earlier. The five most important things you can do for preconception health are:

  1. Take 400 to 800 micrograms (400 to 800 mcg or 0.4 to 0.8 mg) of folic acid every day if you are planning or capable of pregnancy to lower your risk of some birth defects of the brain and spine, including spina bifida. All women need folic acid every day. Talk to your doctor about your folic acid needs. Some doctors prescribe prenatal vitamins that contain higher amounts of folic acid.

  2. Stop smoking and drinking alcohol.

  3. If you have a medical condition, be sure it is under control. Some conditions that can affect pregnancy or be affected by it include asthma, diabetes, oral health, obesity, or epilepsy.

  4. Talk to your doctor about any over-the-counter and prescription medicines you are using. These include dietary or herbal supplements. Be sure your vaccinations are up to date.

  5. Avoid contact with toxic substances or materials that could cause infection at work and at home. Stay away from chemicals and cat or rodent feces.

Talk to your doctor before you become pregnant

Preconception care can improve your chances of getting pregnant, having a healthy pregnancy, and having a healthy baby. If you are sexually active, talk to your doctor about your preconception health now. Preconception care should begin at least three months before you get pregnant. But some women need more time to get their bodies ready for pregnancy. Be sure to discuss your partner's health too. Ask your doctor about:

  1. Family planning and birth control.
  2. Taking folic acid.
  3. Vaccines and screenings you may need, such as a Pap test and screenings for sexually transmitted infections (STIs), including HIV.
  4. Managing health problems, such as diabetes, high blood pressure, thyroid disease, obesity, depression, eating disorders, and asthma. Find out how pregnancy may affect, or be affected by, health problems you have.
  5. Medicines you use, including over-the-counter, herbal, and prescription drugs and supplements.
  6. Ways to improve your overall health, such as reaching a healthy weight, making healthy food choices, being physically active, caring for your teeth and gums, reducing stress, quitting smoking, and avoiding alcohol.
  7. How to avoid illness.
  8. Hazards in your workplace or home that could harm you or your baby.
  9. Health problems that run in your or your partner's family.
  10. Problems you have had with prior pregnancies, including preterm birth.
  11. Family concerns that could affect your health, such as domestic violence or lack of support.

Bring a list of talking points (PDF, 182 KB) to be sure you don't forget anything. If you run out of time at your visit, schedule a follow-up visit to make sure everything is covered.

Your partner's role in preparing for pregnancy

Your partner can do a lot to support and encourage you in every aspect of preparing for pregnancy. Here are some ways:

  1. Make the decision about pregnancy together. When both partners intend for pregnancy, a woman is more likely to get early prenatal care and avoid risky behaviors such as smoking and drinking alcohol.
  2. Screening for and treating sexually transmitted infections (STIs) can help make sure infections are not passed to female partners.
  3. Male partners can improve their own reproductive health and overall health by limiting alcohol, quitting smoking or illegal drug use, making healthy food choices, and reducing stress. Studies show that men who drink a lot, smoke, or use drugs can have problems with their sperm. These might cause you to have problems getting pregnant. If your partner won't quit smoking, ask that he not smoke around you, to avoid harmful effects of secondhand smoke.
  4. Your partner should also talk to his doctor about his own health, his family health history, and any medicines he uses.
  5. People who work with chemicals or other toxins can be careful not to expose women to them. For example, people who work with fertilizers or pesticides should change out of dirty clothes before coming near women. They should handle and wash soiled clothes separately.

Genetic counseling

The genes your baby is born with can affect your baby's health in these ways:

  • Single gene disorders are caused by a problem in a single gene. Genes contain the information your body's cells need to function. Single gene disorders run in families. Examples of single gene disorders are cystic fibrosis and sickle cell anemia.

  • Chromosome disorders occur when all or part of a chromosome is missing or extra, or if the structure of one or more chromosomes is not normal. Chromosomes are structures where genes are located. Most chromosome disorders that involve whole chromosomes do not run in families.

Talk to your doctor about your and your partner's family health histories before becoming pregnant. This information can help your doctor find out any genetic risks you might have.

Depending on your genetic risk factors, your doctor might suggest you meet with a genetic professional. Some reasons a person or couple might seek genetic counseling are:

  1. A family history of a genetic condition, birth defect, chromosomal disorder, or cancer
  2. Two or more pregnancy losses, a stillbirth, or a baby who died
  3. A child with a known inherited disorder, birth defect, or intellectual disability
  4. A woman who is pregnant or plans to become pregnant at 35 years or older
  5. Test results that suggest a genetic condition is present
  6. Increased risk of getting or passing on a genetic disorder because of one's ethnic background
  7. People related by blood who want to have children together

During a consultation, the genetics professional meets with a person or couple to discuss genetic risks or to diagnose, confirm, or rule out a genetic condition. Sometimes, a couple chooses to have genetic testing. Some tests can help couples to know the chances that a person will get or pass on a genetic disorder. The genetics professional can help couples decide if genetic testing is the right choice for them.

Related information

 

Trying to conceive

How do you figure out when you're fertile and when you're not? Wondering if you or your partner is infertile? Read on to boost your chances of conception and get help for fertility problems.

Fertility awareness: The menstrual cycle

Being aware of your menstrual cycle and the changes in your body that happen during this time can help you know when you are most likely to get pregnant. See how the menstrual cycle works.

The average menstrual cycle lasts 28 days. But normal cycles can vary from 21 to 35 days. The amount of time before ovulation occurs is different in every woman and even can be different from month to month in the same woman, varying from 13 to 20 days long. Learning about this part of the cycle is important because it is when ovulation and pregnancy can occur. After ovulation, every woman (unless she has a health problem that affects her periods or becomes pregnant) will have a period within 14 to 16 days.

Charting your fertility pattern

Knowing when you're most fertile will help you plan pregnancy. There are three ways you can keep track of your fertile times. They are:

  • Basal body temperature method – Basal body temperature is your temperature at rest as soon as you awake in the morning. A woman's basal body temperature rises slightly with ovulation. So by recording this temperature daily for several months, you'll be able to predict your most fertile days.

    Basal body temperature differs slightly from woman to woman. Anywhere from 96 to 98 degrees Fahrenheit orally is average before ovulation. After ovulation most women have an oral temperature between 97 and 99 degrees Fahrenheit. The rise in temperature can be a sudden jump or a gradual climb over a few days.

    Usually a woman's basal body temperature rises by only 0.4 to 0.8 degrees Fahrenheit. To detect this tiny change, women must use a basal body thermometer. These thermometers are very sensitive. Most pharmacies sell them for about $10.

    The rise in temperature doesn't show exactly when the egg is released. But almost all women have ovulated within three days after their temperatures spike. Body temperature stays at the higher level until your period starts.

    You are most fertile and most likely to get pregnant:

    • Two to three days before your temperature hits the highest point (ovulation)
      and

    • 12 to 24 hours after ovulation

    A man's sperm can live for up to three days in a woman's body. The sperm can fertilize an egg at any point during that time. So if you have unprotected sex a few days before ovulation, you could get pregnant.

    Many things can affect basal body temperature. For your chart to be useful, make sure to take your temperature every morning at about the same time. Things that can alter your temperature include:

    • Drinking alcohol the night before

    • Smoking cigarettes the night before

    • Getting a poor night's sleep

    • Having a fever

    • Doing anything in the morning before you take your temperature — including going to the bathroom and talking on the phone
       

  • Calendar method – This involves recording your menstrual cycle on a calendar for eight to 12 months. The first day of your period is Day 1. Circle Day 1 on the calendar. The length of your cycle may vary from month to month. So write down the total number of days it lasts each time. Using this record, you can find the days you are most fertile in the months ahead:

    1. To find out the first day when you are most fertile, subtract 18 from the total number of days in your shortest cycle. Take this new number and count ahead that many days from the first day of your next period. Draw an X through this date on your calendar. The X marks the first day you're likely to be fertile.

    2. To find out the last day when you are most fertile, subtract 11 from the total number of days in your longest cycle. Take this new number and count ahead that many days from the first day of your next period. Draw an X through this date on your calendar. The time between the two Xs is your most fertile window.

    This method always should be used along with other fertility awareness methods, especially if your cycles are not always the same length.

  • Cervical mucus method (also known as the ovulation method) – This involves being aware of the changes in your cervical mucus throughout the month. The hormones that control the menstrual cycle also change the kind and amount of mucus you have before and during ovulation. Right after your period, there are usually a few days when there is no mucus present or "dry days." As the egg starts to mature, mucus increases in the vagina, appears at the vaginal opening, and is white or yellow and cloudy and sticky. The greatest amount of mucus appears just before ovulation. During these "wet days" it becomes clear and slippery, like raw egg whites. Sometimes it can be stretched apart. This is when you are most fertile. About four days after the wet days begin the mucus changes again. There will be much less and it becomes sticky and cloudy. You might have a few more dry days before your period returns. Describe changes in your mucus on a calendar. Label the days, "Sticky," "Dry," or "Wet." You are most fertile at the first sign of wetness after your period or a day or two before wetness begins.

    The cervical mucus method is less reliable for some women. Women who are breastfeeding, taking hormonal birth control (like the pill), using feminine hygiene products, have vaginitis or sexually transmitted infections (STIs), or have had surgery on the cervix should not rely on this method.

  • To most accurately track your fertility, use a combination of all three methods. This is called the symptothermal method. You can also purchase over-the-counter ovulation kits or fertility monitors to help find the best time to conceive. These kits work by detecting surges in a specific hormone called luteinizing hormone, which triggers ovulation.

Infertility

Some women want children but either cannot conceive or keep miscarrying. This is called infertility. Lots of couples have infertility problems. About one-third of the time, it is a female problem. In another one-third of cases, it is the man with the fertility problem. For the remaining one-third, both partners have fertility challenges or no cause is found.

Causes of infertility

Some common reasons for infertility in women include:

Age – Women generally have some decrease in fertility starting in their early 30s. And while many women in their 30s and 40s have no problems getting pregnant, fertility especially declines after age 35. As a woman ages, normal changes that occur in her ovaries and eggs make it harder to become pregnant. Even though menstrual cycles continue to be regular in a woman's 30s and 40s, the eggs that ovulate each month are of poorer quality than those from her 20s. It is harder to get pregnant when the eggs are poorer in quality. As a woman nears menopause, the ovaries may not release an egg each month, which also can make it harder to get pregnant. Also, as a woman and her eggs age, she is more likely to miscarry, as well as have a baby with genetic problems, such as Down syndrome.

Health problems – Some women have diseases or conditions that affect their hormone levels, which can cause infertility.

  • Women with polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS) rarely or never ovulate. Failure to ovulate is the most common cause of infertility in women.

  • With primary ovarian insufficiency (POI), a woman's ovaries stop working normally before she is 40. It is not the same as early menopause. Some women with POI get a period now and then. But getting pregnant is hard for women with POI.

  • A condition called luteal phase defect (LPD) is a failure of the uterine lining to be fully prepared for pregnancy. This can keep a fertilized egg from implanting or result in miscarriage.

Common problems with a woman's reproductive organs, like uterine fibroids, endometriosis, and pelvic inflammatory disease can worsen with age and also affect fertility. These conditions might cause the fallopian tubes to be blocked, so the egg can't travel through the tubes into the uterus.

Lifestyle factors – Certain lifestyle factors also can have a negative effect on a woman's fertility. Examples include smoking, alcohol use, weighing much more or much less than an ideal body weight, a lot of strenuous exercise, and having an eating disorder. Stress also can affect fertility.

Unlike women, some men remain fertile into their 60s and 70s. But as men age, they might begin to have problems with the shape and movement of their sperm. They also have a slightly higher risk of sperm gene defects. Or they might produce no sperm, or too few sperm. Lifestyle choices also can affect the number and quality of a man's sperm. Alcohol and drugs can temporarily reduce sperm quality. And researchers are looking at whether environmental toxins, such as pesticides and lead, also may be to blame for some cases of infertility. Men also can have health problems that affect their sexual and reproductive function. These can include sexually transmitted infections (STIs), diabetes, surgery on the prostate gland, or a severe testicle injury or problem.

When to see your doctor

You should talk to your doctor about your fertility if:

  • You are younger than 35 and have not been able to conceive after one year of frequent sex without birth control.

  • You are age 35 or older and have not been able to conceive after six months of frequent sex without birth control.

  • You believe you or your partner might have fertility problems in the future (even before you begin trying to get pregnant).

  • You or your partner has a problem with sexual function or libido.

Happily, doctors are able to help many infertile couples go on to have babies.

Options for infertile couples

If you are having fertility issues, your doctor can refer you to a fertility specialist, a doctor who treats infertility. The doctor will need to test both you and your partner to find out what the problem is. Depending on the problem, your doctor might recommend treatment. About 9 in 10 cases of infertility are treated with drugs or surgery. Don't delay seeing your doctor, as age also affects the success rates of these treatments. For some couples, adoption or foster care offers a way to share their love with a child and to build a family.

Infertility treatment

Some treatments include:

  • Drugs – Various fertility drugs may be used for women with ovulation problems. It is important to talk with your doctor about the drug to be used. You should understand the drug's benefits and side effects. Depending on the type of fertility drug and the dosage of the drug used, multiple births (such as twins) can occur.

  • Surgery – Surgery is done to repair damage to a woman's ovaries, fallopian tubes, or uterus. Sometimes a man has an infertility problem that can be corrected by surgery.

  • Intrauterine insemination (IUI), also called artificial insemination – Male sperm is injected into part of the woman's reproductive tract, such as into the uterus or fallopian tube. IUI often is used along with drugs that cause a woman to ovulate.

  • Assisted reproductive technology (ART) – ART involves stimulating a woman's ovaries; removing eggs from her body; mixing them with sperm in the laboratory; and putting the embryos back into a woman's body. Success rates of ART vary and depend on many factors.

  • Third party assistance – Options include donor eggs (eggs from another woman are used), donor sperm (sperm from another man are used), or surrogacy (when another woman carries a baby for you).

Finding the cause of infertility is often a long, complex, and emotional process. And treatment can be expensive. Many health insurance companies do not provide coverage for infertility or provide only limited coverage. Check your health insurance contract carefully to learn about what is covered. Some states have laws that mandate health insurance policies to provide infertility coverage.

Adoption

If infertility is a problem for you, another option may be adoption. Adopting a baby or child can be one of the most rewarding experiences of your life. So many babies, children, and adolescents in the United States and around the world need a family. Some of these are healthy infants, and many are children with special needs, including physical, emotional, or mental disabilities. If you do adopt a child with special needs, there are both federal and state sources of financial assistance available to help you afford the child's care.

There are two types of adoptions:

  • Open adoption – The birth mother, and possibly the birth father, know something about the adoptive parents. They might even meet and exchange names or addresses.

  • Closed adoption – The birth mother and adoptive parents do not meet each other or know each others' names.

The laws of each state differ on whether, after a period of time, the files of a closed adoption can be opened later to reveal this information. State laws also differ on whether adoptions can be handled by an adoption agency or independently (such as through a doctor, lawyer, counselor or independent organization). Most adoption agencies carefully screen and study the adoptive parents. You can learn more about adoption through the resources at the end of this section.

Foster care

Another option for couples who have a lot of love to share with a child is foster care. Unlike adoption, foster care is a temporary service that responds to crises in the lives of children and families. But it also can be the first step to adopting a child. Many foster children have been abused or neglected, or removed by a court order. Foster families are people who take these children into their homes to provide day-to-day care and nurturing. Children in foster care may live with unrelated foster parents, with relatives, with families who plan to adopt them, or in group homes or residential treatment centers. Even though foster care is viewed as a temporary service, many children have to stay in foster care for long periods of time.

Each child in foster care should have a plan that will let him or her grow up in a permanent family. For many children, the plan is to return to the birth parents. In these cases, foster families may work with the birth parents and the child to help them both learn the skills they need to live together again. Foster parents need to be able to love the children who live in their home, and let go of them when it is time to send them back to their parents. For other children, going back to their parents will not be possible, and the foster parents may become adoptive parents. Or they can keep other kinds of formal or informal ties with the children they parent.

Every state has its own rules about foster parenting. But, the chances are good that you can be a foster parent in your state. There are many more children in need of care than there are foster parents available. To fill this gap, states are looking for people who want to help children and can share their time and their homes. States also give foster parents many different forms of support, like training and financial assistance.

Counseling and support groups

If you've been having problems getting pregnant, you know how frustrating it can feel. Not being able to get pregnant can be one of the most stressful experiences a couple has. Both counseling and support groups can help you and your partner talk about your feelings and help you meet other couples struggling with the same issues. You will learn that anger, grief, blame, guilt, and depression are all normal. Couples do survive infertility, and can become closer and stronger in the process. Ask your doctor for the names of counselors or therapists with an interest in fertility.

Knowing if you are pregnant

A missed period is often the first clue that a woman might be pregnant. Sometimes, a woman might suspect she is pregnant even sooner. Read on to learn when and how to test for pregnancy.

Pregnancy tests

A missed period is often the first clue that a woman might be pregnant. Sometimes, a woman might suspect she is pregnant even sooner. Symptoms such as headache, fatigue, and breast tenderness, can occur even before a missed period. The wait to know can be emotional. These days, many women first use home pregnancy tests (HPT) to find out. Your doctor also can test you.

All pregnancy tests work by detecting a special hormone in the urine or blood that is only there when a woman is pregnant. It is called human chorionic gonadotropin, or hCG. hCG is made when a fertilized egg implants in the uterus. hCG rapidly builds up in your body with each passing day you are pregnant.

Home pregnancy tests

HPTs are inexpensive, private, and easy to use. Most drugstores sell HPTs over the counter. The cost depends on the brand and how many tests come in the box. They work by detecting hCG in your urine. HPTs are highly accurate. But their accuracy depends on many things. These include:

  • When you use them – The amount of hCG in your urine increases with time. So, the earlier after a missed period you take the test the harder it is to spot the hCG. Some HPTs claim that they can tell if you are pregnant one day after a missed period or even earlier. But a recent study shows that most HPTs don't give accurate results this early in pregnancy. Positive results are more likely to be true than negative results. Waiting one week after a missed period will usually give a more accurate result. You can take the test sooner. But just know that a lot of pregnant women will get negative test results during the first few days after the missed period. It's a good idea to repeat the test again after a week has passed. If you get two negative results but still think you're pregnant, call your doctor.

  • How you use them – Be sure to check the expiration date and follow the directions. Many involve holding a test stick in the urine stream. For some, you collect urine in a cup and then dip the test stick into it. Then, depending on the brand, you will wait a few minutes to get the results. Research suggests waiting 10 minutes will give the most accurate result. Also, testing your urine first thing in the morning may boost the accuracy. You will be looking for a plus sign, a change in color, or a line. A change, whether bold or faint, means the result is positive. New digital tests show the words "pregnant" or "not pregnant". Most tests also have a "control indicator" in the results window. This line or symbol shows whether or not the test is working. If the control indicator does not appear, the test is not working properly. You should not rely on any results from a HPT that may be faulty.

  • Who uses them – The amount of hCG in the urine is different for every pregnant woman. So, some women will have accurate results on the day of the missed period while others will need to wait longer. Also, some medicines affect HPTs. Discuss the medicines you use with your doctor before trying to become pregnant.

  • The brand of test – Some HPT tests are better than others at spotting hCG early on.

The most important part of using any HPT is to follow the directions exactly as written. Most tests also have toll-free phone numbers to call in case of questions about use or results.

If a HPT says you are pregnant, you should call your doctor right away. Your doctor can use a more sensitive test along with a pelvic exam to tell for sure if you're pregnant. Seeing your doctor early on in your pregnancy can help you and your baby stay healthy.

Blood tests

Blood tests are done in a doctor's office. They can pick up hCG earlier in a pregnancy than urine tests can. Blood tests can tell if you are pregnant about six to eight days after you ovulate. Doctors use two types of blood tests to check for pregnancy:

  • Quantitative blood test (or the beta hCG test) measures the exact amount of hCG in your blood. So it can find even tiny amounts of hCG. This makes it very accurate.

  • Qualitative hCG blood tests just check to see if the pregnancy hormone is present or not. So it gives a yes or no answer. This blood test is about as accurate as a urine test.